I was invited to a friends wedding in Mumbai the second week of March. India has intrigued me and what better way to see it than against the back drop of a celebration.
My flight from JFK connected in Kuwait and put me in with 5 hours to spend there. Not ideal but it only cost me $350 and provided the chance to see a slim part of Kuwait. My plan was to immediately hit immigration and head to a nearby mall for dinner to be back to the airport. Through my research, I had heard this was really all Kuwait had to offer as it was still rebuilding. No matter because travel delays only gave me 3 hours at the airport.
Once in Mumbai I arrived to my hotel at 5AM local time, a full 25 hours after walking out of my door in New York. I snuck just enough sleep to make it though the day. I’ve found this is the best way to beat jet lag. As soon as you arrive, get on the same schedule as everyone else. Use over the counter sleep aids or coffee to adjust if need be. Whatever the case, get on the local time immediately. I did a pre-booked cab at the airport and though my driver didn't speak english, I found him very helpful. Upon arrival, I pulled out my wallet and gave him what I thought was a small tip. Tip; always know the exchange rate before spending anything. I gave my guy a 2000rpe tip, thats 8X the cost of the ride.
First up for the wedding festivities, we had a homemade lunch at the groom’s families’ place. Here I met some of the grooms grad school friends, all westerners mostly from the Seattle area. While still trying to mix and mingle we all spent most of time together. After lunch, came a reception with all wedding guest along and the Bride and Groom. They had rented out a trendy restaurant that we filled to what looked to be capacity.
Arriving to the venue was definitely a wow factor. The place looked amazing, complete with red carpet, camera crew to capture the event, and even a step and repeat back drop. My new western friends had planned ahead and purchased Kurtas for the men and Saaris for the ladies. They all looked amazing and I felt like I was missing out on the experience for wearing my western attire. Shortly before departing NYC the bride and groom sent out an email instructing us we had signed up to join in an dance routine. Attached in the email was a instructional video to the Bollywood style dance we would be performing together. I had made the most of my time in the Kuwait airport to learn the dance steps and felt marginally prepared. Once there we all rehearsed together a couple of times. By this point alcohol was the only missing ingredient. After a few drinks and no food I was now in the dancing mood. As the time approached we learned there were about 10 groups performing similar dances back to back. We were 3rd inline but performed well enough to make into the hearts of others! After the last routine I deiced should I ever get married this is something that will happen at my reception, even if I have to hire dancers. This puts everyone in the mood to dance and let loose.
I arrived back to my hotel, drunk, around 2am and nearly immediately passed out in one of the two single beds in my room. I naturally woke up around 6:30AM with an excitement to go see the city. I grabbed my already packed camera bag and hit the streets. We were right next to ocean in part guarded by the northern peninsula part of Mumbai. Middle to late day there wasn’t anyone here. This early it was full of people that appeared to commuting, some just out for a stroll and even a handful or so doing bootcamp style work outs. I took some pictures and video for my YouTube channel and soon felt comfortable enough to pull my drone out for some quick shots. I knew this was illegal but not only was no one paying attention, but I hadn’t seen a single police officer since my arrival. The first flight went well and I was able to get some good aerial shots of the city without any issues, nor did anyone seem to notice or care. I packed up and thought about other locations but with the rising sun, decided to just stay put. This was a mistake because at this point it drew the attention of the local cops. Upon my drones return from my second flight two cops were standing directly behind me. As soon as I grabbed it they asked me to come with them.
Before going into detail of my arrest I should point out, most Indians shy away from definitive answers or responses. They are a very “go with the flow” culture, nothing is good or bad. It is literally the saying I hate so much; "it is what it is". In most instances when talking to a native, you will notice a head bob that looks as though the chin makes a small circle. This isn’t a yes or no, but a subjective acknowledgement response.
The two officers that asked me to come with them didn’t seem to speak any English. We walked back to their patrol motorcycle and just stood there. Several times I tried to make small talk to get a gauge on what was going to happen next. After about 3 mins a SUV with two other cops pulled up and I was asked to get in. Several times I asked why, and where we would be going to which I received a head bob response and “no problem” reply. The cop in the passenger seat spoke some English and said we would just drive around for a moment. I noticed the two guys on a motor bike were following. I was asked several questions as to my visit to which I gave cryptic “dumb American” responses. Soon we pulled over to the curb and the two cops from the motorcycle approached. They all talked for a bit while I sat in the backseat taking mental not of where I was and what my long game would be.
Soon the English speaker turned and asked to see my drone. I pulled it out, they all discussed. He then told me flying was illegal and I asked: “okay, what is the penalty”. They all talked and bobbed heads for a bit. Then told me the penalty was 25,000rupees, about $400 US. I started laughing and told him he would have to take me to the police station. They all stared in bewilderment. I asked if he knew where the police station was and understood. I had already separated my money with 2500rpe in my wallet, 1000rpe in my left pocket and another 4000rpe in my left shoe. I pulled out my wallet and made sure they all saw me pull out everything that was in there. I told them, “this is it, it’s all I have” followed by “I can call the embassy for more”. They talked for a bit then turned back around and said the find was $2500 or I would be booked, held and would have to come back for court. I agreed but they kept talking. This aggravated me.
We entered this game where the only guy who spoke English would discuss with the other three and then turn around and say something to me. As if they were practicing what they would say, and then test it out on me. I sensed they had never taken a bribe before. I started interrupting their practice sessions with questions of my own followed with a stern “do you understand”. Soon they asked to see my cell phone and went though all my pictures to make sure I had not recorded them. I now sensed they were worried they had gone to far down the take a bribe road and were worried about getting into trouble of their own. The tag number of the car was visible on the dash of the patrol car, I begin using these numbers to call them by. This let them know I knew who they were and could find them if need be.
My last interruption I took 500 off the agreed upon price of the bribe and asked if I should call the embassy. They all quickly responded “No problem, no problem”
“yes, there is a problem, do you want me to pay my 2000rpe here? Or do you want to take me to the station? Decide or I’m calling the embassy. Do you understand?” The next step in the pattern was for them to discuss it amongst themselves. I stopped this with a firm “hey, make a decision” and put another 5000rpe in my pocket. They now understood their bribe was getting smaller. I put the remaining 1500 on the seat and opened the back door staring the motorcycle leader in the eye. He was trembling. As I got out, the driver took another 200rpe off the stack I left on the seat and handed it to me as the motorcycle cops quickly jumped on their motorcycle and sped off. Kind of a funny sight as they were both decent sized men and the bike was small under powered.
Along these lines, 90% of the time I try to remember, I/you represent your entire country. Subsequently, the people you encounter will hold future visitors accountable for the way you act. Be nice, follow cultural norms to the best you can, and generically try to be a shrinking violet to not upset the status quo. Leave the place in a better condition than you found it. I can't think of how many times I've seen Americans abroad being obnoxious. As an American, I know its just obnoxious, but to locals its far worse.
Thoughts and comments are welcomed below: